r Letter From Eastie: Italians take their tomatoes very seriously. . .
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Collaged view of Boston, from East Boston

Letter From Eastie

News and other items from East Boston, Massachusetts.

Wednesday, September 15, 2004

Italians take their tomatoes very seriously. . .

The Boston Herald police log continues to be a valuable source of information. As reported on September 10th:

It wasn't yet midnight in the garden of good and evil on Coleridge Street when a man walking his two dogs past some tomato plants suddenly found himself being sprayed with bullets by an irate onlooker with his green thumb on the trigger.

Gonzo gardener Lawrence Venezia, 50, fearing the dogs would lift their legs on his prized plants, was alleged to have been yelling, ``Get your (expletive) dogs away from my tomatoes!'' while peppering the air around the passer-by and his pups with a loaded handgun.

Venezia, who police said emerged from his house carrying a clear baggie containing a gun and a tomato (your basic survival necessities) and who admitted he'd downed ``a few glasses of wine,'' referred to the firearm as a ``pest control device.''
He must have been arming himself for locusts, then, because Venezia, whose FID card was expired, also allegedly had four shotguns and more ammunition than can be listed in this column.

There was one other witness who was more than happy to help the cops lock Venezia up - his tomato in life, Mrs. Venezia.

1 Comments:

  • At 3:17 PM, Blogger StevilDoer said…

    So, is he in the slammer? His tomatoes (I say "Tomato", you say "Potato") are up for grabs, yes?
    As are his eggplants and peppers? I need to know, i'm making a salad.

    RIP Johnny Ramone!!!! Gabba gabba hey!!!

     

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